I was shopping for baby clothes and wanted to throw myself off a Dubai mall – I think I’ve got PTSD, says Becky Vardy

REBEKAH Vardy has revealed she considered jumping from the top floor of a shopping mall in Dubai while pregnant after being publicly accused by Coleen Rooney of leaking stories.

Becky exclusively tells The Sun: “I think my lowest point was when I was in Dubai trying to get a flight to come home early from holiday.

Rebekah Vardy has extended an <a href=olive branch to Coleen Rooney despite losing their libel battle” height=”960″ width=”700″ class=”lazyload” src=”https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg” data-credit=”Louis Wood” data-sizes=”(max-width: 375px) 335px, (max-width: 520px) 480px, 620px” data-img=”https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?strip=all&w=700″ srcset=”https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=335 335w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=480 480w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=620 620w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=670 670w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=960 960w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=1240 1240w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=1005 1005w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=1440 1440w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=1860 1860w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=1340 1340w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=1920 1920w, https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/NINTCHDBPICT000751036478-2.jpg?w=2480 2480w” bad-src=”data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 0.7 1"%3E%3C/svg%3E”/>


Rebekah Vardy has extended an olive branch to Coleen Rooney despite losing their libel battleCredit: Louis Wood
Becky says she bears former pal Coleen no ill-will


Becky says she bears former pal Coleen no ill-willCredit: Splash

“I knew what I was coming back to — I just knew there was going to be spiteful hatred everywhere.

“Jamie and I were in a shopping mall at the time buying baby clothes, and I just thought, ‘I don’t want to go through this, I don’t want to live like this’.

“For a split second, I said to Jamie, ‘I feel like I just want to jump off this top floor’.”

She said it was “devastating” for him to see her go through it.

Rebekah Vardy breaks social media silence after Wagatha Christie defeat
Rebekah Vardy breaks down & says she’s been ‘let down’ over Wagatha feud

Becky reveals she has twice been hospitalised with mental health issues since the Wagatha Christie row erupted in October 2019.

She has seen a string of counsellors and was put on medication to alleviate her anxiety. Becky was subsequently diagnosed with depression and put on anti-depressants – which she is now off.

Sipping a glass of water, she says: “I was having serious panic attacks.  I had kidney stones which were brought on by stress, and I just felt like my life was falling apart.  Physically, emotionally and mentally it was exhausting.

“It was draining. I had to go to hospital a couple of times because they were really worried about my mental wellbeing.

“And since the court case, I think I’m probably suffering with PTSD — I feel physically sick when I talk about the trial and what happened, and I have nightmares. I haven’t gone to get a diagnosis yet but I do know I probably need some more therapy. It’s been a horrible time.”

But during her interview, she extended an olive branch to Coleen despite losing their libel battle, saying: “I’d take her for a coffee.”

She says: “If I saw her in the street tomorrow, I’d ask her if she wanted to go for a Caffe Nero.

“Life is too short to be resentful and hold grudges and be bitter towards someone. That is not me. I am not that person.”

However the wife of striker Jamie blasts the trial judge, Mrs Justice Karen Steyn — and says she was “slut-shamed” and bullied in the harrowing court hearing.

Most read in The Irish Sun

She sighs: “The way the cross-examination was handled was atrocious. I have never felt so bullied and manipulated and shamed in my whole, entire life over things that had no relevance whatsoever to do with this case.

“I was slut-shamed. I was shamed for things that I had done 20 years ago or more. I felt bullied.

“It felt like I had done something that was the most horrendous thing.  I felt like a murderer at times and ultimately I wasn’t given an option to answer questions.  They were manipulated, they were twisted, and I was bullied. It was disgusting.”

But she says: “I have no regrets at all. The only thing I would change is that it looked like it was driven by a narrative bias. But in terms of regret and taking it this far, no.” She is also unimpressed with the phrase “Wagatha Christie” which she calls “demeaning”.

Life is too short to be resentful and hold grudges and be bitter towards someone. That is not me. I am not that person.

She adds: “The whole thing is misogynistic isn’t it?  It’s ‘women shouldn’t be allowed to defend themselves’, ‘women shouldn’t be allowed to do this’, ‘they shouldn’t be allowed to do that’.

“No one says, ‘Oh, Johnny Depp shouldn’t be blowing all that money on legal fees’. No one questions him. Women just won the Euros! Why does this sexist language continue?

“It also feels pretty classist — like people are feeding off pitching two successful working-class women together. It’s so patronising.”

Becky has lost pals and fans since Coleen’s bombshell post but shrugs: “Anyone that is classed as a lost friend wasn’t a friend anyway.  I have a really small circle.

“I have always had a really small circle. I don’t really mix with football because I don’t like to cross Jamie’s working line and our life together. We like to keep that separate.

“So in terms of other wives and girlfriends, yeah I am still friends with some. A lot of them would come to me for advice. A lot asked me a lot of things.

“I gave a lot of advice to certain people who will not be named. I know a lot of stuff… but I keep quiet.  Karma comes around in its own time.”

Asked if she really did offer Coleen a place to live when she and husband Wayne were having problems, she giggles: “Which time was this?”

Becky continues: “I did. And that was genuine. An act of solidarity. To say, ‘Look, I am here if you need me. What you are going through is horrible and I wouldn’t want anyone to go through it.’”

Becky says: “It’s a bit of a bitter pill to swallow but life goes on. That is not my beef.  I don’t want to look at people and think, ‘Well I did that for you so you should’ve done this for me.’”

When their husbands played for England, Coleen and Becky were often seen together in the crowd.

During the trial, a witness for Coleen claimed former I’m A Celeb contestant Becky deliberately sat behind the  Liverpudlian at the 2016 Euros clash with Wales.

Anyone that is classed as a lost friend wasn’t a friend anyway. I have a really small circle. I have always had a really small circle. I don’t really mix with football because I don’t like to cross the Jamie’s working line and our life together.

It was claimed that Becky and pals were asked to shift after they allegedly pinched seats belonging to the FA family liaison officer.

Becky vehemently denies the “ludicrous” claim and says of Coleen: “I wouldn’t say we were close.   We sent each other presents when our kids were born. I invited them to our wedding and they sent a wedding gift.

“She had congratulated me on my pregnancy in August… that was two months before she posted what she did.

“I felt sorry for Coleen. I felt sorry for her because there was so much negative press. And it wasn’t because I was trying to get private information off her.

“I couldn’t care less about any of that. I was trying to be supportive like I hope people would’ve been supportive to me.”

Coleen was pictured entering court each day wearing a plastic grey air-boot following a fall at home. When I ask Becky if Coleen is “milking the moon boot” she laughs: “Ohhh I couldn’t possibly [comment]…!”

Becky says she “reached out” to Coleen in November 2021, but did not hear back. However she insists she is still open to reconciliation.

She explains: “My outlook on life is that I won’t let things eat me up and destroy me — I don’t have any bad feelings towards Coleen.

“And I know that sounds strange after everything that has gone on, but I don’t. Rightly or wrongly, she did what she did for her reasons.

“All I can say is, I wish she had done things differently, and her timing was terrible.   But, you know, I don’t (blame) her — I take aim with the process and the judge getting it wrong ultimately.”

Becky in tears at Heathrow after coming back from Dubai


Becky in tears at Heathrow after coming back from DubaiCredit: AJM/RPPIX/SPLASH
She says she was tempted to jump off the top floor of a mall in the city


She says she was tempted to jump off the top floor of a mall in the cityCredit: Alamy
Rebekah's hostility is directed firmly at the female High Court judge, Mrs Justice Karen Steyn


Rebekah’s hostility is directed firmly at the female High Court judge, Mrs Justice Karen SteynCredit: Avalon.red

You’re Not Alone: Where to seek help if you need it

If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support:

Related Posts